I have come to the conclusion that there is some sort of disconnection between my mouth and brain. I will not go into details about how the brain works when it comes down to the motor skills of speech, but I will say that this "disconnection" is driving me insane.
I consider myself a thinker, I am always deep in thought about everything that goes on in the world; about everything dealing with life, love, the existence of everything on this planet, etc...
But I have one little problem...
Whenever, I try to have an intellectual conversation with someone (or actually any type of conversation...), it comes out wrong.
Sometimes because of this little issue, I feel like people think differently of me, far from the person I truly am. Sure, I play around and talk about random things like pig feet or complain about someone in my life, but truth be told I would rather have a witty debate any day of the week. Of course, I don't seem to appear like I could have one, thanks to this so called "disconnection."
See my brain starts to think something like "The Hippocampal processing..." and then when it comes time for me to actually say it, I end up with "The Hippo Progress..."
Okay, so that's not a good example, but my point is that almost everything I think about comes out the WRONG way.
It comes to the point where the other person takes it the wrong way as well. It has actually gone as far as getting into some sort of argument because of a certain miscommunication.
You know how people tend to say you should think before you speak? Well I think, but I end up speaking caveman. This also adds to one of the many reasons why I hate talking on the phone and as to why I come off as quiet to some.
I have also been perceived as a bit... air-headed, which of course I took it offensively since I am not one without knowledge and I certainly am not stupid.
The above illustration, demonstrates something that actually happened to me with a friend. You can imagine my surprise when he mentioned the fact that he thought I was air-headed.
I also would like to state that my personality is a bit bubbly and being the dreamer that I am, well you can imagine that the mouth brain disconnection only adds to the "air-headed" perception. I'm really not quite sure as to why it happens, maybe I think too fast or maybe I need to give myself enough time to respond. I have even taken speech classes and aced them all, so what gives?
Am I the only one that suffers from the mouth brain disconnection? I can understand, if someone makes you nervous, but people so rarely make me nervous. I actually want to talk to people, but the disconnection that my mouth and brain go through is enough to have people walking away and that is just sad.
Hopefully, someone comes up with an easy fix to this situation. Maybe then I could actually have an intellectual conversation with someone other than a rock. (Okay, I just exaggerated that last part, but you know what I mean. Do you?)
-Hanny the coffee bean
