Monday, April 11, 2011

Since I Lost My Sense of Humor...

I've been doing a lot of thinking about my life and may I just add that life is indeed too short. As the years pass, the older I am getting; the older I am getting, the less I want to be in school.

I never thought of the importance of school, never really cared much for it. Sure in high school, I was an honor roll student with honor classes, college courses, and a yearbook editor. I had so much promise for my future, but once I got into college, I didn't know where I was headed. It was always clear to me that I wanted to major in Psychology. I dreamt with the idea of helping others with their problems; I wasn't doing it for the money, but for love of people.

This ardure to help others was what kept me motivated to reach my goals, which at the time was to become a psychologist. I did, however, have other passions in life, but one of them stood out the most. The very thing I wanted to do since the age of 10 and that was to be in broadway. As a child I would spend my time making up songs and putting acts in front of the adults and this passion of mine stayed with me until the beginning of college.

I had taken acting classes, singing classes, guitar classes and dance classes, I was for sure in love with the idea of being in broadway. Then when I started my first year in college, that dream fell apart. I had taken acting classes in college, only to get critized about my weak performance...when all this time I thought I was good at what I did.

From then on I concentrated on my general studies, but I would also take other courses that had nothing to do with my major. Well fast forward to three years later and I finally finished what should have been my two year degree. Of course in my mind that didn't matter much, as long as I was moving away and was going to finally finish my other two years....So I thought.

I haven't finished yet, which has made me feel old in all possible ways. Yes, there are others who have not finished like me, but I've always been so determined with life. I always had an idea that by age 24, I would have my masters and yet that will not be happening. Everything I had ever planned for me changed and to make things worse, I want to be a magazine editor.

How on earth can I, if my commas and semicolons are in all the wrong places.... How can I, if my sentences are all jumbled up and my sense of humor and creativity have left me? I see everyone around me accomplishing things that I have so wanted in my life and yet here I am writing in a blog that most don't even read anyways.

Though, I try to keep positive about my success, it makes me wonder how others have reached that success.

So my fellow readers, how on earth did you get to the place you are in now? how did you reach your goals? What challenges did you have to face to get to the place you are in now?

Sorry for the lack of pictures and humor, I promise I'll have something better up....eventually.

Hanny the coffee bean


  1. Me? Blind luck. I landed my job by mistake after (with out realizing) applying for it twice and not even knowing what country it was in. Luckily for me the company was too inexperanced back then to know I was too inexperanced for the job. Luckily I learned on the job and made myself useful.

    I always try to remain optimistic about these things. I know it sounds like over used advice but it really helps. If you focus to much on how things are not going well then they will just carry on like that. I get writers block all the time and days where I feel like I'm not funny. I find if I just accept it's not the right moment and don't focus on it it sorts itself out.

    Hope this helps.

  2. To reach your goals, you have to be proactive. You can't just sit around waiting for everything to sort itself out. Summon up the energy and determination somehow (whether that means therapy or just going to talk to friends) to get something done and go forward with what you need to do. You want to be a magazine editor? Volunteer. Go out there and offer to be an editor for something other than magazines and see if you like it. Work your way up.

    And who said you had to give up your Broadway dreams just because one person said you're bad? Criticism is PART of improvement, not the end of it. Keep taking classes to get better or go somewhere else. Maybe they were just jealous of your enthusiasm.

    Or instead of being a magazine editor, you should consider writing stuff for Broadway. That way, you can be involved with two things you like.

    Either way, of all things, KEEP AN OPEN MIND.

  3. Also, no one will read this, hm? I think your 230+ followers would beg to differ. ^_-

  4. Oh, Hanny, I think that we both are going through a rough patch, my dear...

    I am trying very hard to remain positive these days (and sort out some paperwork), but in my experience, you just have to be active to reach your goals.

    Don't worry so much about the sense of humor. I haven't been able to sit down for weeks to write a "proper" blog post because I've been occupied running all over Dijon. :-P

    In any case, I am hear to listen to you, my partner-in-crime! I know that you will accomplish your goals (but in a timely manner)!

    -Barb the French Bean

  5. Invader Stu: Thank you, actually its not over used advice! sometimes we actually do need a reminder to remain optimistic about these things. It did make me feel better and to know that maybe hopefully I'll be as lucky as you.

    RandomRambler: As much as I love broadway, I could never see myself on stage or becoming a screenwriter (though it is something to consider). I did, however, started to look for volunteering places that deals with editing, so I'm excited. Thank you for your words, I do have to remember to keep an open mind.

    Barb: Thank you for always being there for me! I hope everything is going well in Dijon! Just remember if you do go back to Miami...It's just a mini vacation.

    -Hanny the coffee bean

  6. You're welcome, Hanny! I'm glad my advice can come in handy occasionally. :)

  7. I got here by chance. "A long and winding road". Vet tech, temp, techie. My plan to dominate the business world ( as I was raised to want) fell apart when I realized I didn't want it. Since then, no plan. Just walking through interesting doors/Windows when they arise.


Apparently, leaving comments on this blog is a hit-or-miss game of Russian roulette: you are either lucky and can comment away, or you are required to log in when the settings are CLEARLY set to allow trouble-free commenting (sorry 'bout that, folks). If anything, the Facebook page is always a viable option. :) -Barb