Saturday, April 16, 2011

Video Rants

On my spare time, I like to watch youtube videos. Sometimes, I'll watch them just to see what everyone else is complaining about.

about a month ago, I came across a video everyone on the internet kept complaining about. I didn't think it would be as bad as I thought, but I was wrong. When I first heard this video, my ears were bleeding from the bad singing and my mind went into the most bizarre rants I have ever had.

Rebecca Black- It's Friday

Not only do the kids in the car look young to be driving, but she looks too young to even be going out. For someone who is singing about Friday, she doesn't seem too excited, especially when she mentions partying. Of course she's not wearing anything slutty (I'll give her props for that), but she looks too emo to be going out. Why are the other girls dressed in color and she's in black? and is it just me or does it seem that every time they do a close up of her, she's on the toilet with a bad case of diarrhea? No one in this video looks like they are having fun...."We So Excited"...who is we?? all the other kids look terrified that they might get whipped or thrown in the torture chamber.

Who is that guy in the car? and why is he in the video? were they trying to make this a rap video? Who is he supposed to be? Is there a point to the video? They just randomly added a guy driving to who knows where and she's just looking more psychotic in every shot. They should have just put a phony Santa Claus on the toilet, I rather see that then children screaming help on the inside.

The next video that I just have to talk about is called the Apple Store Dance.

The kid must be like 10 years old, but he has moves. Where the hell did he learn to move like that?? He obviously has no shame since he has other videos in the Apple store dancing to different music. What's up with the girl in the furry hat? They let animals in the Apple store now? If you pause the video in 0:00, the girl on the left is making the scariest face...kind of looks demonic.

Pause it at 1:34...shouldn't that move be Rated R for someone his age? I can't imagine what he will be like when he is an adult...

Kids...they are so creative.

This next video left me saying WTF...seriously this world is so messed up.

Das Beer Boot Music

What the crap does cheese have to do with beer? I know they are talking about the boot glass, but really? cheese?? and how about that energy drink...5 hours crap...he's basically stating it will kill you if you overdose on it, learn from the beer boot man people, but wait what is this?! he is alive?! Only to go over dose on pancakes, chocolate, and some other stuff you can fit in the beer boot glass....why did he have to be German? Why not Russian? Russians drink too...

Pause at 1:02, that is so nasty his wiener in butter?! did he say butter?? eww. This guy is really excited about his damn boot glass (though it makes me want to get one...).

Last but not least, this video is just too funny! I couldn't help laughing at this video.

My Drunk Kitchen

I'm not sure if she is drunk, but its hilarious what can happen in the kitchen. I wouldn't recommend cooking drunk...especially if you might end up blacking out leaving the stove on. "This is a show about friendship" - I thought it was about cooking, this girl seems to be forgetting what she is doing. She's making grilled cheese sandwiches, but she has no cheese...Pause at 2:26, I think she almost smoked the place.

While cooking, lets talk about toilet seats! because instead of making food, she wants to talk about toilet seats. I like her rules, its always amazing to see what drunk people come up with.
You gotta love the fact that she only ended up eating bread...this goes to show drunk people can't cook. Obviously.

That's all for my video rants.

Hanny the coffee bean


  1. You should check out the MONSTER video of Kanye West and Kate Perry's Extra-Terrestrial something.

    It will make you stop watching videos on youtube altogether.

    Just saying.

  2. I know there is a German film called "Das Boot" (pronounced "boat") which was about a submarine crew during WWII.

    Still, the digustingness of the Das Beer Boot video is NOTHING in comparison to the scary, bacon-induced concoctions Epic Mealtime has come up with...



    Watch this one.

  4. I showed the Rebecca Black video to my wife this weekend. Why should I be the only one to suffer?

    It's just such a strange song. All she does at the beginning is sing about what she is doing. Wake up, go down stairs, eat my breakfast. What the hell? and then she starts singing about how Thursday is followed by Friday which is followed by Saturday and so on. It's not really mind blowing lyrics.

    But of course it is the song that dares to tackal the question like which seat of the car to sit in. Who cares about that meaning of life s##t.


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