Growing Up Sucks Balls

When I was younger, I used to have this huge desire to grow up. To do everything everyone older than me did--going to concerts, driving, traveling, staying up past 11 p.m. and all the other things I couldn't do as a child. I would sometimes throw temper tantrums screaming "I CAN'T WAIT TO GROW UP!"

Oh how wrong was I...

                                                 photo credit: Ahoova via photopin cc
                                                 (Nope...not me. I'm a woman)

It was foolish of me to think that my life would be easy and to overlook the very things that stress me out.
Bills, bills, and more bills. As a child, I did not comprehend the way of life, to me it was just a world of playgrounds, cartoons, swings and food. Nothing else existed to me and on occasions I would throw hissy fits when I didn't get what I wanted. Of course, as I started to grow up, so did my responsibilities.

Below you will find the growth of my responsibilities:

Age: 1
Responsibilities: Pooped, ate and slept.
Job: Cried

Age: 6
Responsibilities: Pooped, ate, slept, smiled and looked pretty.
Job: Eating McDonald's Fries.

Age: 10
Responsibilities: Pooped, ate, slept, annoyed brother, occasionally smiled and rarely looked pretty.
Job: Watched cartoons

Age: 13
Responsibilities: Annoyed brother, never smiled, hid from bullies, chores and observed (Yes...I still pooped, ate and slept).
Job: Referee for fights in my house

Age: 16
Responsibilities: Chores, homework, walking the dog, screaming, applying to colleges, pooped, ate, and slept.
Job: Breaking out of my house every so often.

Age: 20
Responsibilities: Gym, homework, driving, boyfriend, working, paying cell phone, rarely slept, looked pretty, and ate.
Job: Worked in Retail.

Age: 22
Responsibilities: Gym, homework, driving, working, paying several bills, rarely slept, dated, looked like a disaster and ate.
Job: I had temp. jobs (at least...I made them temp.)

Age: 25 (NOW)
Responsibilities: Gym, driving, working, pestering the mailman, paying A MILLION BILLS (SCHOOL LOANS....NOOOO!), rarely sleeping, looking alright, dealing with a few stubborn guys, snapchatting people, and  finding ways to make more money (yes yes yes I still poop and eat).
Job: Marketing and Business Development for a good company.

I must admit, looking at this list, I have come a long way from where I used to be, but the fact that I can't seem to pay off anything...is..well...ridiculous.

Thus, I have come to the conclusion that growing up sucks balls, a phrase that a friend used to say on a daily basis. A phrase I have come to know as:

sucks balls- An expression used when things are shitty (according to Urban Dictionary).

 While I do have a job that pays, I still do not make enough to pay off my credit cards, loans, car loan and everything else that is on a loan. So for the next few days I have gone Google "insane" and have spent a few days looking for ideas...

How to make money according to Google:

1. Become a gold digger
2. Sell your body to advertising companies so they can tattoo your forehead.
3. Become a moving billboard- wear ads on your shirt, use their pens and use your car to stick their ads on.
4. Sell items on Ebay (I have plenty going on...this can only get me so far, unfortunately).
5. Do another persons dirty work by joining a site that everyone seems to be on and have no chance of even getting that job to begin with.
6. Garage sale! (I have no yard and no garage...I live in a cave somewhere).
7. Pan Handling
8. Write Reviews (unfortunately this doesn't pay all that well...at all).
9. Sell your photography (I have yet to find someone who will buy any of it).
10. Sell your soul to the pawn shop (I don't even have gold or anything worth pawning).

I read plenty of other ideas that were well...a bit...disturbing. At some point I was waiting for someone to say that the best way to make money was by selling unicorn milk.

Gladly, there isn't anyone twisted enough to think of that, except for me. Maybe I should start selling unicorn milk, possibly do a false advertisement of how magical you'll feel in the mornings after drinking unicorn milk or how unicorn milk will make you sparkle just like the vampires in Twilight.

Unfortunately, I don't think unicorn milk can stop my responsibilities or pay all my bills...Growing up definitely sucks balls.

BALLS.

Hanny the coffee bean

(and yes I really had to emphasis the balls part).

Instagram, The Bum, and I

In my last post, I Am Alive, I sort of promised to have a great post for you all.

Well...this isn't it.

Instead, I would like to make a post about Instagram. If you have an Iphone or an Android, then you know exactly what I'm talking about and for those of you who don't, I'm sorry.

Instagram is an app that allows you to take pictures, make it look like you just used a lomography camera and then share it with friends, strangers, puppies, inmates, butterflies, brick walls, bums and anyone else on Instagram.

Yes, I am an addict to Instagram, but not to the point of having a million pictures (at least not yet). That said, I would like to share a few Instagram pictures of my own.

This is a picture I took in Miami

 A very loved place in Miami

Piano in Orlando

 For those who would like to follow me, you can follow me @hdrea. Please let me know that you are one of my readers as I would love to follow!

Also, I'm curious to know how many of you use Instagram and how often do you use it? What was the first Instagram picture you ever took?

Hanny the coffee bean

We Got An Award, Yo.

We here at Two Beans Or Not Two Beans have recently been granted The Versatile Blogger Award!

*cheers, fanfare, confetti and ticker tape parade*

As with most blogger awards, its acceptance comes with having to earn it by following as set of rules. So, without further ado, the procedures are as follows:

Numéro Un.
Nominate 15 bloggers for The Versatile Blogger Award.


These lucky fellows are none other than:


1. Invader Stu from Invading Holland. One of my (Barb) favorite blogs of ALL TIME. A fair warning, though: you may bust a gut laughing when you read about his hilarious cultural shock life in the lowlands.


2. Emily from Emily in the Glass. Emily writes beautifully about France and wines and takes awesome photography.

3. Seilann from Sand from a Distant Shore. Her blog is quite underground, so be sure to channel your inner hipster when you read it.

4. Neenuh over at Francey Pants. Her talented Minnesotan humor needs more exposure, folks.

5. Tricia at Confessions of a Recovering Cynic. She's going to publish a book soon!

6. Crazy Cris at Here, There and Everywhere. Her hiking journeys across Spain are simply gorgeous!

7. Joanna at Dehydration and Procrastination. Whenever she posts new cartoons, it is magical.

8. Ash from Ash-Matic Does Things. This new-comer is indeed up and coming with a blogging punch! His imaginative take on activities are hilarious and featured with cartoons.

9. Brandon and Bryan from A Beer for the Shower. Start reading their blog posts and cartoons and you won't stop until you've reached the very beginning of it...or have died from laughter.

10. Harley from 1., b., Platypus....Her various topics will keep you reading. Some will make you think and others will make you laugh (One of coffee bean's favorite reads).

11. Doublexuan from Whiny Pencil. He is an illustrator with some AMAZING illustrations. Check it out and be amazed!

12. Dave from Blogography. His cartoons are just too cute and he always has a good story to tell. He also has some nice pictures on his posts.

13. The person from Arguing with a Doughnut. Has crazy cartoons :D You will love it!

14. Amy from Geek with Curves. If you like all geeky things, like me, then you will simply love this blog. (Coffee bean especially loves all the good youtube videos!!)

15. The person from Ikea Hackers. Coffee bean loves all things from Ikea!! So she just couldn't help herself...

(To the award's recipients: even if you don't participate in these sort of posts, or have won it previously, just know that we do genuinely love your blogs and wanted to show some recognition!)

Numéro Deux.
In the same post, add The Versatile Blogger Award.

(Please take a moment to "ooh" and "ahh" at its glorious green splendor.)

Numéro Trois.

In the same post, thank the blogger who nominated you in a post with a link back to their blog.

That honor befalls upon none other than the lovely Anna Smith over at Universal Gibberish and Mik from Stylish Obsessions! Thank you so much!

Numéro Quatre.

In the same post, share seven completely random pieces of information about yourself.

Since there are two of us, we've decided to divide the Random Facts in half. Therefore, each fact will be evenly distributed by 3.5. You can read about these facts at the end of the rules list.

Numéro Cinq.
In the same post, include this set of rules.

Numéro Six.
Inform each nominated blogger of their nomination by posting a comment on each of their blogs.

Right. So, here are the Seven Random Facts about us, Coffee Bean and French Bean. We will also refer to ourselves in the third person because it will help distinguish who said what; please don't think we are pretentious like The Jerk Mido from Ocarina of Time.

Drumroll, please...

Uno.
French Bean and Coffee Bean met at the same high school, but due to the difference in their graduating years, they only ever shared one class together: yearbook.


Dos.
Coffee bean has a strange addiction to keys (i.e. key earrings, key necklaces, decorative keys etc...).


She has more key items somewhere. By the way, the earrings you see, she made them herself.

Tres.
If it weren't so detrimental to her health, French Bean would happily subsist on nothing but ice cream, café cubano, medianoche sandwiches and Stacy's "Simply Naked" Pita Chips.


But mostly ice cream.

Cuatro.
Hating the same routine and look, coffee bean changes her hair color/style every so often.

Cinco.
French Bean has a D.J. alter ego (who will be coming soon to a birthday blog post near you).

Seis.
 Being a social drinker, coffee bean is proud to say that she can chug beer and other alcoholic drinks.


coffee bean does have a picture of her chugging down beer, but she rather not show it. Instead she will show you a picture of this fruity drink.

Siete.
To prevent any psychological distress, French Bean's underwear somehow needs to (rather illogically) either complement or coordinate with her wardrobe.


Take, for instance, this photo of her wearing a frilly top with red flowers.

Even if you don't see it, chances are French Bean is sporting her red bra and panties to go with it.




We are so happy to have had such an award bestowed on our blog! Thanks once again from both of us!

Hanny the Coffee Bean and Barb the French Bean

Three Months Later and Christmas is Here!

Okay, so Christmas isn't here, but I never got to show the Christmas pictures of my amazing trip to England.  In fact there are many things I have not posted; from crazy adventures to everyday accidents. Those stories, however, will be for another day. So without anymore delay, the wonderful pictures from my trip.

The first thing I did was go into a pub.

Somewhere in Cambridge.

I loveeee the telephone booths.

A little market place somewhere in Cambridge.

Underground.

I never knew London had a Chinatown...and I've only been in London at least 5 times.

Proof that I was in England! and no it was no photoshopped or else I would have made myself look like a model.

Westminister Abbey.

Wellington Arch in London.

@_@ Me+Sweets=KABOOM!!

Kings Cross station (Yes, this is where they made platform 9 3/4 for Harry Potter and no, I did not go see the famous platform.

Cool statue in the train station.

A huge sculpture in the train station.

My transportation for the few days I was there.

The houses are so cute ^_^

I was in the middle of nowhere visiting friends.

Every church in England seems to have a cemetery, which is not seen in the U.S.

I definitely forgot the name of this place, but I believe it was a type of museum. I just remember a whole bunch of people walking dogs.

Me again! 

The name of this place made me laugh. Imagine shopping at the cow. "Oh I got this dress at the cow, do you like?" 

King's College London....Damn I should have gone to this school.

Somewhere around the universities.

I believe this was part of the university.

You could say this is college town, since Cambridge University and King's College are around.

It was so peaceful.

"I got this beautiful blouse at SweatyBetty." o_o

The grass is soooooo green for being winter.

The round church.

I love how I mostly never see this in U.S unless you are in college town.

CANDDDDDDDDDDYYYYYYYY!!!!

my new job...(not really)

Fake Michael Jackson in England 

I so want to see this.

I still haven't seen Les Miserables...somehow I feel like I'm missing something important.

Chinatown.

Very wise man.

Abraham Lincoln in England?!

My first beer in England.

This christmas tree was made out of legos.

Fish and chips. Not really my favorite, but I did tell myself I would try something different and most common in England.

I love how this picture captures how windy it was by the hair on my face, yet shows the beauty this world has (no I'm not talking about me, I'm talking about the Big Ben).

Big Ben.

Buckingham Palace.

There are more pictures, but I decided to just show the better ones. Sorry for the side way pictures and for making one of the longest posts ever.

-Hanny