Friday, June 25, 2010

Make the Yo-Yo Stop!

43 days have passed since I left France.


...Saying that makes me feel like some poor addict who counts and takes each day at a time. No. I sound more like someone who pathetically logs about his travels while he wanders lost in some foreign land.


Day 43: I cannot take it anymore. My body craves the wonderful fromages of Caprice des dieux and Le Régal de Bourgogne. My lips tremble when I barely remember the creamy heaven that once graced across my tongue. I have no choice: I must make due with some Boursin that I scavenged at Costco.



I admit that, for these past few days, my emotions have shifted from "On top of the World" ...






...to "Crushed under a Boulder."


Life happens. Things occur. My feelings change.


I keep missing certain people. I feel betrayed by others. I drink my coffee. I walk in the sunshine. I missed a call on my cellphone. I chat with my friends. I go to the beach. I hear the birds sing outside. My ex wants to replace me with someone else. I'm angry at him. But I also want to comfort him when the girl he liked turned him down...




Ugh. My mood changes several times a day. Up and down. Up and down. My heart winds in a never-ending Yo-Yo effect.


When I feel depressed, I feel trapped within my own body.







I also have the power to emancipate myself.


Another day begins. I wash my hair. I put mousse in it. I put on my make-up. I spray on my Kenzo Amour perfume on my clothes.




I feel better already. I am grateful for the life I have. I am happy to be alive.



And so my day begins...


Barb the French Bean

2 comments:

  1. Oh goodness, I go through this cycle more than I would like to admit.

    ReplyDelete

Apparently, leaving comments on this blog is a hit-or-miss game of Russian roulette: you are either lucky and can comment away, or you are required to log in when the settings are CLEARLY set to allow trouble-free commenting (sorry 'bout that, folks). If anything, the Facebook page is always a viable option. :) -Barb